Getting to know me.

Since I haven't felt inspired (read: pissed off) enough lately to write anything interesting, I'm taking the easy way out. Here's a generic list of questions I found on Al Gore's Internets. Enjoy.

* Do you have any pets?

I have two dogs: a Miniature Pinscher named Fletcher and a Tibetan Spaniel named Lucy. Both were adopted from Pet Pal Rescue in St. Petersburg, FL. In the interest of saving myself as much hassle as possible, I prefer to buy my cars new, but get my pets pre-owned.

* What was the last book you read?

I recently finished the Twilight series of books by Stephanie Meyer. No woman over the age of 18 should ever read these books. All they do is make you long for the lusty, obsessive, angst-filled relationships of your youth. That being said, I'm embarrassed to say I loved them. It's a good thing all my old high school boyfriends have unlisted phone numbers.

* Do you like to cook?

Cooking is high on the list of things I love to do, but don't do often enough. I'm good at it too. (Like other things I love to do, but don't do often enough.)

* What's your favorite food?

I'm a junk food junkie. I love McDonald's and Dunkin Donuts. If I could switch the nutritional content of broccoli and donuts, my life would be perfect.

* Do you have brothers and sisters?

I'm an only child. It's at this point that I always feel the need to point out that I bought my first car myself and paid my own way through college. Everybody always thinks only children are spoiled. Granted, I did get the barbie dream house and the barbie cottage for Christmas one year, but the lavish gift giving didn't continue once my tastes grew more expensive. I do have an unnatural sense of entitlement, but I'm not sure if that's a result of my upbringing or something more innate. Is asshole-ish behavior genetic or environmental? The debate continues.

* Which sport do you like?

I'm not a big fan of sports unless there is money involved. If I'm sitting in a sportsbook in Vegas, I'm a fan of whatever team I'm betting on.

* Have you ever met a famous person?

Not really. I met Dan Cortese when I was 16. He's a D-List celebrity, you can probably google him. He was pretty hot back then. My friends are I went to Saugatuck Beach where he was filming an episode of Beach MTV. I accosted him and demanded he sign autographs and take pictures with us. I'm sure he was thrilled.

* How do you spend your free time?

Plotting world domination from behind my laptop. It's not going all that well.

* What kind of people do you like?

I like people that make me laugh. If you are smart, sarcastic, and have a good sense of humor, I will fall madly in love with you. I don't know where all of these people are hiding, but I would like to meet more of them. Also, if you find me irresistibly charming and hilarious, that helps too.

* Which languages do you speak?

I speak just enough Spanish to convince native speakers that I understand them. This can be a dangerous practice.

* What are you best at?

I'm good at writing pointless articles about my observations on life. Unfortunately, these serve no real purpose other than to amuse myself and my handful of readers. I'd rather be awesome at tennis or something.

* What do you think you will be doing five years from now?

I have no idea. Pontificating on the ridiculous minutiae of everyday life? Oh wait, I'm doing that now.

* Are you a 'morning' or 'night' person?

I'm definitely not a morning person. I don't like to stay up late either though. I probably have a window from about 7:00 pm to 7:15 pm where I feel totally awesome.

* If you knew you could try anything and not fail, what dream would you attempt?

Write a novel, cure cancer, and enter the Miss America pageant.

* Where do you spend most of your money?

Besides bills? Fast food, high heels and prescription medication. Not necessarily in that order.

Damn. Those were pretty boring questions. Note to self: get out more.